Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Fear of Success

This past week of knitting has been haunted by an uneasy feeling. I've been working on the mystery project that I swatched in red for a few posts back. I really want to do it, but imagining myself on the other side with a finished project is really foreign to me. That project represents a level of awesome that I can't actually imagine myself attaining (and that's pretty hard as I AM pretty awesome already). But it's still kind of overwhelming. I find myself making excuses to not work on it: Margaret pulled my ball of yarn into a stringy mess, so I can't work on it. I finished that skein and before I can work on it again, I have to wind another skein. Oh I can't take it to the park, it's too complicated of a project.

When I write it out, that seems really self-defeating doesn't it? Yeah. I'm over halfway done with that project. And it will rock. And I will rock. I just need to get myself to do this.

In the meantime, I've needed a project that is more mobile, so I random number generated a project in my now organized queue and came up with a cowl. I've never done a cowl because I never really "got" the appeal, but maybe this one will change my mind. Last Friday McKay and I saw an early showing of John Carter and I was able to knit in the dark theater the whole time and got pretty far.

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